The $7 Billion Gift To Big Oil

If the Republicans were to ever call on Congress to pass a bill to saw off Tom Daschle's left arm above the elbow, Daschle would be the first to agree, earnest and parrot-like, that America desperately needed such a bill. He'd just object to, you know, some of the provisions. What we really need, he'd say -- while his colleagues nodded in thoughtful agreement -- is a Democratic Saw Off Tom Daschle's Arm Act. Then the horse-trading would begin, and soon the Senator from South Dakota would proudly announce bipartisan approval of a "compromise" bill to saw off his arm above the wrist -- a bill that would also leave Daschle a secret decoder ring to wear on his other, unsevered hand -- and he would declare it a great day for Democrats, and Americans, a day to praise this institution of Congress really, which is filled with wonderful people on both sides of the aisle who are just getting the job done day in and day out doing the peoples' business.

Meanwhile the Republicans, frankly amused, would be telling everyone who'd listen how they were still coming for the whole arm. Daschle had given them a Senate bill, they had their own House bill, and now the leaders of each house of Congress -- who are, you may have noticed, Republicans these days -- could hammer out a final "compromise".

What brought that observation on was the new energy bill. Has Congress noted that the oil industry is raking in money and doesn't need their give-aways?

Oil giant ChevronTexaco's second-quarter profit nearly quadruples

ChevronTexaco's rebound hasn't excited investors because virtually the entire industry has been reaping big profits from higher prices for crude oil, natural gas and gasoline, said Fadel Gheit of Fahnestock & Co.