Hang in there, Texas Eleven. You are not forgotten.

Molly Ivins -- Gov. Goodhair Perry says the AWOL senators are holding up "issues of great importance to the people of Texas." That's funny. There has been one and only one item of business on the agenda for both special sessions called by the guv (at a cost of $1.7 million each): the crass rejiggering of congressional district lines in order to elect more Republicans out of Texas. Using taxpayer money for partisan political purposes, period.

Fox is actually claiming that the words "fair and balanced" belong to Fox as part of its trademark. Franken in turn is threatening to trademark the word "funny." I think I'll trademark "insightful."

The lawsuit accuses Franken of being "deranged," "a parasite," "sophomoric" and lacking "any serious depth or insight." That certainly proves O'Reilly doesn't lie like a rug. I got caught in a verbal slugfest between the two of them recently in Los Angeles. The high point was when O'Reilly cleverly riposted Franken's account of his lies by screaming: "Shut up! Shut up!" A particularly sound argument, I thought.

Franken, in turn, said, "Bill, we're not on Fox News."