Sunday, January 06, 2008

The Dave Barry Campaign

He has now reached New Hampshire and is running into the other candidates:
There was a good crowd on hand, although the most enthusiasm was generated by a small group of young men who were in favor of electing Chuck Norris president. There was also a person dressed as a snowman, wearing a big snowball head and a T-shirt about global warming, which I assume the snowperson is against.

Speaking of warming, the crowd was warmed up by a blues-rock band called Mama Kicks, and when Huckabee surged into the gym he picked up a bass and joined in playing "In The Midnight Hour." It was a little rough at the start, and Huckabee turned around and bent over to fiddle with the amplifier, so for a few seconds the crowd was basically looking directly at the Huckabutt, which is a view you rarely get of a leading presidential contender, fortunately. But then the band got it together and did decent versions of Twist and Shout and Mustang Sally, rocking the house New-Hampshire style, with people keeping time by rhythmically thrusting signs that said "HUCKABEE" and "MAKE GLOBAL WARMING A PRIORITY" into the air....

After roughly 43 hours of remarks by prominent New Hampshire Democrats living and dead, the crowd heard from major contenders Dennis "The Only Dennis Kucinich on Earth" Kucinich, Hillary Clinton, Bill Richardson and Barack Obama. All of them are for change. Until you have heard major Democratic contenders, you do not realize how many times it is possible to use the word "change" in a single speech. They're in a big fight over who will be the best changer. At one point, Clinton, sounding like a veteran toll-booth attendant, said, "I've been making change for 35 years."

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